My to do list ain't shrinking!

I've been down with a cold for the last few days (it feels like forever), and my meds induced sleeplike states have had me thinking about my lists et al...and it seems like the only things that we've crossed off the list are:

1. venue (alredy booked and a HUGE advance paid).
2. pandit for ceremony. this was a no-brainer as he's a friend of dad's.

the bulk of my trousseau shopping is done already since i started collecting ages back. but the thing is, its been a stressful courtship and even more stressful engagement. i don't want any stress around my wedding...i know its unavoidable, but i'd like to cut down on whatever we can just to save my sanity. also stress gives me acne. urgh.

oh yeah and we've finalised a location for our honeymoon. that's item 3. no clarity on hotels/flights and visas yet.

my parents are finally(!) waking up to the fact that i need to get a wedding lehenga, and that it cant be purchased or ordered unless they work out a bugdet. that means a guest list so we can budget for food and accomodation. sigh.

my sniffles are getting worse. excuse me while i go sneeze.

depressed!

Enough froth, time for some introspection.
Sometimes it feels like finally, it’s happening, because I’ve been waiting for this for almost five years. Almost ever since we got together, as a matter of fact. Yep, I was that sure he was Mr. absofreakinglutely right. Bt I’ve also been waiting for my, ahem, dream wedding all my life. And the way things are spiraling out of control and shaping themselves up…well sometimes it just freaks me out.
1. The location and ever after debate, which seemingly has no end and no solution. I wouldn’t put this as number one, except that my in law’s to be have some very weird ideas about how a wedding should be conducted. But I guess my peeve has more to do with the fact that they don’t like me, have agreed to this wedding under protest, and are making it clear, rather than anything else. Sigh. All right I don’t blame them, much, for not liking me. I don’t like myself sometimes. I just don’t know why I should run a marathon for it.
2. My losing battle with the bulge(s). enough said, as this speaks for itself.
3. My constant freak out fits. Will I make a good wife? A good daughter in law? Et al…I get stressed about the fact that my cooking won’t come up to par and various assorted woes which frankly are too boring to type. My sister (and fiancé) say that as long as I make a good wife that’s enough. Is it?
Why did I ever decide to get married?

I'm just generally excited. Sometimes I'm not, and sometimes I'm just plain disgusted. So..

And so to enjoy this feeling.